The Statistic

I can assume you’ve heard it before.  Special education teachers have the highest  attrition, or “burn-out,” rate compared to other teaching positions. 50% of special education teachers leave their jobs within 5 years. Half of those who make it past 5 years will leave within 10 years. This equates to a 75% turnover rate every 10 years (Dage, 2006).

I’m not going to lie.  I have questioned my choosing of this profession on more than one occasion.  It gets to me.  The never-ending paperwork, the stressful meetings where parents cry, the extreme behaviors, and the hours and hours spent prepping.  I have considered switching positions to be an Instructional Coach. I have even gone as far as asking the superintendent to move me to an Interventionist position (of which I was denied.)

But in the end, I did it!! I didn’t become a statistic.  After 25 years, I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that being a special education teacher is what I am meant to be. I might have lost a little of my sanity along the way, but I never lost sight of my ‘why’.

Your WHY

I can remember the exact moment in time when I realized what God had been trying to tell me my whole life.

I read somewhere that we don’t get burned out because of WHAT we do.  We get burned out because we forget WHY we do it. It’s possible that you chose this profession, but it is more likely that this profession chose you!  We are rare creatures with beautiful hearts and the strongest of wills.  God chose us to work with these special little ones for a reason.

Write down your why and purposefully pull it out and read it every so often to keep you grounded.

Cry it out

So how do we get through it?  How do we make it so we don’t cry every night or dread every morning.  I know it’s hard but it is possible.  

The first thing you have to do is to tell yourself...

It's okay to cry. 

Crying is not a weakness.  It is a coping mechanism.  But cry it out and get on with it.  Don't wallow in self-pity too long or you'll begin to think it's okay to stay there and it absolutely isn't.  It's not healthy for you, it's not fair to your family and it doesn't help your students.  

Be Proactive

I can usually tell when I'm spiraling downward.  I lose my patience quicker, I snap at family members, I'm unorganized and I get that painful knot underneath my shoulder blade.  Be proactive when you get to feeling "off" and take some measures to prevent a meltdown.

Talk to yourself like you would talk to someone you love. 

Don't beat up on yourself for having negative feelings about this job.  Remind yourself that you picked a tough profession and you knew going into it that there would be days like these.

Write down 3 things you appreciate about yourself. 

We don't give ourselves enough kudos.  Get that pen and paper out and remind yourself why you are so special.

Schedule a "No Plans" day. 

This can be a weekend or just take a mental health "sick" day.  Use this day to do NOTHING but  rest and relax. I promise, things will be fine without you and you will feel renewed and ready to come back.

 Spend time with friends.

Sometimes all you need is to vent to a good friend.  Or don't even vent.  Just catch up and let your mind take a break from your stressful life.  Listen to someone else's problems for a while and realize everyone has stress.

Get organized.

Our brains crave structure.  It's how they make sense of the world around them.  Use this to your advantage by making lists of things that you need to get done.  Get a yearly calendar filled out with when to send home meeting notices and when IEPs are due.  Buy a teacher binder with calendars, SPED forms and other organizational tools.  There are lots of these on TPT.  You can get mine HERE.

Leave a positive note for yourself.

Tuck it into your desk drawer so you will see it every so often.  Hide one in a book.  Put one in the front of your IEP binder so that you see it each time you open it.

Spend time outdoors.

Nature has a calming effect.  Spending time outside is important for a healthy mind, body and spirit. Gardening can be relaxing (for someone who isn't me).  I like to just sit in the sun and soak in the vitamin D.

Take naps.

This is important especially if you aren't getting enough sleep at night. I love naps but don't ever seem to have the time to drift off completely.  Instead, I stay in my car for about 15 minutes after work before going inside the house with no music, no cell phone and no school thoughts.  It's my idea of a nap and it works!

Treat yourself to something you don't normally

Grab an ice cream cone after work.  It's okay to splurge every once in a while.

Print out an inspiring note and tape it to your computer

Have a favorite quote that speaks to you?  Have an affirmation given to you by a coworker or boss?  Tape that baby somewhere where you'll see if often.

In the Thick of It

Meltdowns can happen at any time.  It's not like you can plan for one.  Being proactive with yourself helps but sometimes you don't know it's coming. When that happens, there are things you can do to help you get through it.

Take 5 minutes to just sit and breathe. 

Take a timer, go to an empty room or the bathroom and just sit there.  Add more time if you need.  Take deep breaths and regulate yourself.

Accept being "Good Enough". 

No one is perfect.  Not even the person who looks like they've got their crap together is perfect.  Kids don't want perfect.  They want and need you...in all your "okayness".  

Give yourself permission to say NO.

One of my BIGGEST mistakes throughout the years is not saying no often enough.  You can't be on every committee.  You can't be everyone's mentor.  You can't cover everyone's duty. You can't fix everyone's technology issues.  It's okay to say no.

Avoid saying "I ought to" or "I should" to yourself.

Quit beating yourself up.  You don't have be SuperTeacher all the time.  I really don't like that term "I should have".  Well you didn't and that's ok.  Accept the choices you made and make a different one next time.

Ask for help.

Be willing to share how you are feeling with others.  Asking for help should not be seen as shameful.

Accept your mistakes.

Give yourself some grace and realize mistakes are a way of helping you make progress and learn.

Write down 5 things you are grateful for.

Remembering the abundant things in our lives reminds us that this moment in time won't last forever and that life is so much more than this little setback.

Step into another teacher's classroom just to watch children.

I love kids. The look on their faces when they learn something new always brightens my day.  Sometimes it's good to step out of a sped classroom, get a change of scenery and see what is going on across the hall.

Stop the glorification of BUSY.

Why do we always feel we have to be doing something?  It is good to take a break from the hustle.

Take a walk outside.

Walk out to the playground.  Walk around the school.  Step outside and let the sun shine on you.  It might be all you need to get through the rest of the day.

Don't compare what you feel inside to how others appear outside.

Everyone, and I mean everyone, has their off days.  Don't let them fool you.

Ask yourself what you would do for a friend in a tough situation.

And then do that for yourself.  

Coping Skills

So you took preventative measures but you still had a meltdown.  Been there.  Done that.  After you have recovered from the self pity party, it's time to get back on the horse.  Use these techniques to regroup.

Read a book.

I'm not talking self-help or educational books.  I'm talking about getting lost in a love story or a mystery.  Books are a convenient escape from reality.

Turn off your phone and spend time with family.

No really.  I'm serious.  Put.  The.  Phone.  Away.  Be present in your life.

Take a bubble bath (with or without wine).

I'm not encouraging drinking alcohol as a method of stress relief but I'm also not discouraging it.  Sometimes a good glass of wine and a hot bubble bath is just what the doctor ordered.

Have a dance party to your favorite music.

I'm not gonna lie.  I do this. I'm a product of the 80's and I love to dance so a little Madonna or Bon Jovi is my choice.  But it can be anything.  Just get those endorphins up.  I promise, it will put a smile on your face.

Watch some mindless television.

No thinking needed.  Just sit and giggle.

Watch a funny movie.

Laughter is good for the soul.

Small amounts of retail therapy never hurt anyone.

Me! Me! Me!  This is my go to choice when I need a little pick me up.  I don't spend a lot but a new shirt or some cute earrings always makes me feel better.

Bottom line

So that's it...my 31 suggestions for keeping the gray out of your hair and the fire in your soul. 

I want  you to stay in the field of special education.  But the bottom line is.... it's entirely up to you.  If you let the little things get you down, you won't have the will to fight for the kids who need fought for the most.